Thursday, February 09, 2006

So far

today we went to New Ark - the first time I've been and so worth the money I think I'll dig a den and live there. Very what Boss needs/into right now. Very "Waldorf" which is working well for us right now. It is beautiful in a non-conventional sense. We fed the animals (must remember to take my own food next time!) and just ran around lot. I didn't take my coat and I just withered for two hours. But its OK who needs blood. And fingers. And indeed full functioning body organs...

Boss loved it. That would be an understatement. This is precisely the type of thing I feel as though he has been missing out on which I took for granted as a kid. Things have certainly changed since when I was a nipper. I used to wander the estate from morning til evening (literally), climbing trees, investigating, going home for a drink/sandwich, then forging on with my adventures. It wasn't unusual to be out of the house all day at three years old, as there were so many other three year olds out too. So in many ways this generation misses out on a lot. But we live in dangerous times (or are we just more aware of the dangers now? Who knows. We live in less innocent times for sure). So having this place is a real find.

I love Peterborough now that I am mobile. Yes Hannah you are right. Having a car helps a LOT masha'allah.

Having issues with Boss regarding behaviour (again). Spent a lot of the morning having to say sorry to Bella for various misdemeanors perpetrated by my son. Sorry for having him. My womb feels guilty for your pain, pettle. I don't know how to get him to not make monkey noises and frighten the animals; how to stop him pushing too hard; to stop hitting others; to stop being too rough.

Yes I know he's a boy. And I know (think! Hope!) he'll grow out of it, but it's OK saying that when it's not your children being twonked. I don't want people to start dreading him or provoking him or even picking on him simply because he refuses to accept social norms. What can I do???? No, really - answers here please.

Jaws spent the entire return journey screaming as though he were on fire. Lovely. The only baby I know to HATE the car. Must buy not-Farley's rusks to shove in his gob when traveling. Choking hazard or not. I can't drive with that type of tension. It just isn't funny.

Carnations came out great. I will try celery next maybe, but I don't really like buying it because it makes me gag. hm...

3 Comments:

At 11:02 pm, Blogger Hannah said...

I think it can take a while for them to learn how to be with other children.

I know I have the questest time when Isabella's mixing with friends she sees all the time. They have found their place with one another, figured out how to communicate feelings, wants, etc without having to get a mardy adult involved who will probably inflict a result neither party wanted.
He'll learn what's socially acceptable by being around others, wanting to join in and figuring out how to get involved.

 
At 5:32 pm, Blogger Qalballah said...

Well, he's had four years - how long does he need around other children before he understands that they don't like being walloped?? And it doesnt matter how often he sees people - he's still vying for alpha-1 status in the pack. He doesn't want to join in, he wants to arse about and trash things and make monkey noises and be giddy and silly and be top dog. Argh!

I love him. I just don't know how to keep him in check without destroying his essential self. Where is the point between when you tame them so much they can't fly, so to speak?

Not that I want an anti-social nutter all my life, but it seems to come part and parcel with who he is. I left it for a while thinking it would be OK - and now I just want him to be socialised.

I just dont know how to MAKE him be!!

I'm a lousy mother. *hangs head*

 
At 7:54 pm, Blogger Hannah said...

No you're not. It is a *really* fine line between gently guiding them the right way and control.
I'm having backchat issues with my eldest atm, that's another toughie - on the one hand of course I want her to 'respect your parents and do as you are asked' but I don't want to kill her practicing her powers of persuasion. I just don't want her to practice on me!

He does seem happy to play on his own but that will soon change when there is a group of them and he wants in...probably.

 

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