Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Did nothing

as usual. Cow mother day. I'm taking me stress out on my family. Again. As usual. I hate being ill. Got an appt. on Fri with specialist. Not holding my breathe.

Did tangrams a bit today.

Hanaa - still not posted your letter.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Did some rod work

He has a very low concentration span and easily rushes off when things are not completed. Anyone suggest an activity which will make him more diligent in finishing off tasks??

Still ill

Today we did some piccies with our "magic maize", it is versatile in that you can make 3D things and also stick it to paper - but here's the good part - WITHOUT THE AGENT OF GLUE. Bonus. Then he did sticker books on his own and "hard" lego. I'm not a creative or imaginative person at all. Would love to be a person who can delight their children with wonderful creative projects, but it aint gonna happen. So lego it will have to be...

Anbody know where I can get a set of "gears" type thing for about a tenner *doesn't hold breathe*??

Other highlight of today is the diggers outside our house :)

Friday, November 25, 2005

Ooooooooooooooooooooh... *introduction tunes kicks in*...


Now Everybody! Second verse same as the first - altogether now...

Boss puked from 3am onwards and I am now frantically washing all bedsheets. Jaws is bunged up with his FIFTH cold! Not bad seeing as he hasn't turned 5 months old just yet.

Anyway, just re-read some comments MERRY: thankyou for offering to land on my doorstep - sorry didn't reply til now. Haven't been up to PC use. Anyway, very kind of you to offer. If I had the room for all four of your kids you are very welcome any time. But the sad truth is we are full to capacity and over-flowing, the house bursting at the seams...

Hope everyone gets better sooooooooooooooon.

PS Hanaa haven't posted your letter at ALL. Sorry. Can post it tomorrow insha'allah if you like??

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Saying of Hazrat Ali (ra)

"The rights others have over you - remember them; the rights you have over others - forget them"

Tuesday, November 22, 2005


this blog again Seekers Digest

The Way of Sufi Chivalry, by al-Sulami (d. 412/1021)

Really enjoyed this blog entry from ReflectOnThis

The Way of Sufi Chivalry, by al-Sulami (d. 412/1021)

Show compassion to all Creation. Nasr ibn Muhammad reports that Junayd related that there was a shaykh in Damascus called Abu Musa al-Qumasi who was a man of Futuwwah (Chivalry); everyone praised him. One day, the shaykh's house collapsed on top of him and his wife. When people began to dig in the ruins, they found his wife first. "Leave me," she said. "Go and try to find the shaykh and save him. He was sitting in a corner over there." They left the woman, dug where she had pointed, and found the shaykh. "Leave me," he said. "Go and save my wife." Each wanted the other to be saved. That is the state of those who are together for the sake of Allah and who are friends and brothers in the name of Allah. They are in that compassionate state at all times. [ p. 61 ]

Bring joy in the lives of your friends and meet their needs. [p. 37]

Dhikr, or remembrance of Allah, will affect both your interior and exterior life. The effect of dhikr in the interior is acceptance (rida); in the exterior, its effect is humility and piousness (khudu' and khushu'). [p. 49]

Ja'far al-Sadiq was once asked, "What is Futuwwah?" He replied: "Futuwwah is not possible with quarreling and backbiting. Futuwwah is feeding people, giving to them, being pleasant and honorable to them, and not causing them difficulties." [p. 64]

You can correct your state by correcting your actions. Abul-'Abbas ibn al-Khashshab reports that Dhu Nun al-Misri said: "The one who settles his affairs find peace and comfort; the one who strives to come closer, comes closer; the one who keeps pure becomes cleansed; the one who trust in God finds security; the one who mixes himself into affairs that do not concern him may lose the things that should concern him." [p. 70]

Listen to good discources, participate in good conversations, and abide by the prescribed behavior upon these occasions. Having good manners means showing respect to those who are superior to you; loving friendship and agreement to those who are your equals; kindness and compassion to those who are lower than you; obedience and modesty to your mother and father; and compassion in the education of children. [p. 73]

Abu Bakr al-Razi reports that Abu Ya'qub al-Sufi said: "There are men who will devote fifty years of effort to guarding against the slips of the tongue in recitation of the Koran, yet are not at all mindful of the slips that their inner being makes. People in that state are misguided." [p. 77]

Know the value of time and how to act and behave in the present. [p. 87]

"...The right word at the right time helps love to endure." [p. 95]

'Ali ibn Muhammad al-Qazwini reports that Abu Yazid said: "If you have a friend whose relationship with you is at its worst, the relationship will certainly improve if you act according to the code of behavior. If something is given to you, be thankful to Allah, because He alone turns the heart of others in your favor. If you suffer calamity, take refuge in repentance and patience, because your being will gather strength only with patience." [p. 102]


Not been up to much PC work as it.makes.me.WORSE. And this is making me dizzy too. Just wanted to say jzks to the sisters who have lent me their children and ferried me about - it has made a huge difference to the quality of my life already. Boss is very very perky by all this friend-seeing and it is so nice to see him *smile* again. He was ever so proud to have Ib visit him and play Lego. And even though I am still dizzy seeing my boy happy is a real tonic and it's lifted my spirits enormously. Jzk

Saturday, November 19, 2005

"Take benefit of five before five: your youth before
your old age, your health before your sickness, your
wealth before your poverty, your free-time before your
preoccupation, and your life before your death."
[Muhammad sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam - al-Haakim,
al-Baihaqee: Saheeh]

Thursday, November 17, 2005


OK, don't want to be melodramatic but as I have no one else to talk to I'll talk to the world. I am unwell, and it's getting worse. So much so that no painkiller is able to kill the pain in my head. I have been diagnosed with labyrinthitis *shrugs* but until the ENT gets their hands on me we won't know for sure. And that could be months as I simply cannot afford private medical care to get a consultant any quicker than NHS time.

The sad thing is it is my children who are suffering since I cannot get out of the house all that often. Walking is hard and triggers off a lot of pain and I don't have access to a car too often. And when I do car journeys make me ill. So my kids have seen none of their friends properly for a long time.

As my husband is disabled this effectively means my children now have two disabled parents, no extended family to call on and no outside contact beyond the extremely minimal. I find this distressing for them. I know what it's like to have no friends and it breaks my heart to have to give them the same childhood I had.

Right now life is bad. If you have any playmates you don't want them lend me them for an hour or two.

Does anybody know if I can get help with social services? Would I have to go through my GP for that?

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

A year late

...just found this article

Monday, November 14, 2005


I've had enough hassle with Jaws' car seat - it's clumsy to lock into the car, he wakes everytime I have to transfer him to the buggy etc etc and I was looking at this as an alternative... can anybody tell me if THIS is good value for money (which I am short of) and whether it'll be worth it or not. Ta.

Anybody suggest..

... any good art/craft ideas book? A rainy day idea book? Anything that will keep a three year old amused while one deals with a tiddler...

Nice Site

I think I found and lost this site now I've found it again and I like.

A bit late...

... But our firework pictures nonetheless:

Does anybody else feel

that they are constantly failing, nay, crippling their children?

No? Just me then.

Has anybody read either of these two books and which of them is the better:

From my Sisters lips

Daughters of Another Path: Experiences of American Women Choosing Islam

Saturday, November 12, 2005

The beautiful name of Allah

Below and in the sidebar. I intend to link it to a beautiful site but haven't made my mind up which one. I just love looking at this name. In fact it was one of the things which drew me to Islam. Even as a non-Muslim my heart would leap when I saw it somewhere. Kinda like the way in does when you see the one you love. It is funny how it would happen when I didn't even know what it said....

Anyway. Beautiful.

Saved by the Veil

Found at MereIslam

The interesting article linked to below helps shatter some common stereotypes about Muslim women. It focuses on a new book by Na'ima Bint Robert, a British convert to Islam, entitled From My Sister's Lips and profiles several other converts as well.

The Veil has set us free
by Diana Appleyard and Rachel Halliwell
Financial Mail Women's Forum - May 1st, 2005

For more myth-shattering information about Muslim women, click here, here, here and here.

Friday, November 11, 2005

It is a sheer co-incidence that I began to read him Lion, Witch & Wardrobe recently as I had no idea (due to the fact that I live in a social vacuum) that they were making it into a film nor that THIS site existed.

I really do need to get out more don't I?


surprise. Not.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Teaching tales...

There was once a small boy who banged a drum all day and loved every moment of it. He would not be quiet, no matter what anyone else said or did. Various people who called themselves Sufis, and other well-wishers, were called in by neighbors and asked to do something about the child.
The first so-called Sufi told the boy that he would, if he continued to make so much noise, perforate his eardrums; this reasoning was too advanced for the child, who was neither a scientist nor a scholar. The second told him that drum beating was a sacred activity and should be carried out only on special occasions. The third offered the neighbors plugs for their ears; the fourth gave the boy a book; the fifth gave the neighbors books that described a method of controlling anger through biofeedback; the sixth gave the boy meditation exercises to make him placid and explained that all reality was imagination. Like all placebos, each of these remedies worked for a short while, but none worked for very long.
Eventually, a real Sufi came along. He looked at the situation, handed the boy a hammer and chisel, and said, "I wonder what is INSIDE the drum?"

Nasrudin was throwing handfuls of crumbs around his house. "What are you doing?" someone asked him. "Keeping the tigers away." "But there are no tigers in these parts." "That's right. Effective, isn't it?

One day Nasrudin lent his cooking pots to a neighbor, who was giving a feast. The neighbor returned them, together with one extra one - a very tiny pot. "What is this?" asked Nasrudin. "According to law, I have given you the offspring of your property which was born when the pots were in my care," said the joker. Shortly afterwards Nasrudin borrowed his neighbor's pots, but did not return them. The man came round to get them back. "Alas!" said Nasrudin, "they are dead. We have established, have we not, that pots are mortal?"

People ran to tell the Mulla that his mother-in-law had fallen into the river. "She will be swept out to sea, for the torrent is very fast here," they cried. Without a moment's hesitation Nasrudin dived into the river and started to swim upstream. "No!" they cried, "DOWNSTREAM!That is the only way a person can be carried away from here." "Listen!" panted the Mulla, "I know my wife's mother. If everyone else is swept downstream, the place to look for HER is upstream."

A powerful king, ruler of many domains, was in a position of such magnificence that wise men were his mere employees. And yet one day he felt himself confused and called the sages to him.

He said:
'I do not know the cause, but something impels me to seek a certain ring, one that will enable me to stabilize my state.

'I must have such a ring. And this ring must be one which, when I am unhappy, will make me joyful. At the same time, if I am happy and look upon it, I must be made sad.'

The wise men consulted one another, and threw themselves into deep contemplation, and finally they came to a decision as to the character of this ring which would suit their king.

The ring which they devised was one upon which was inscribed the legend:

This, too, will pass.

A king had two sons. The first helped the people by working for them in a manner they understood. The second was called 'Lazy' because he was a dreamer, as far as anyone could see.

The first son gained great honours in his land. The second obtained from a humble carpenter a wooden horse and sat astride it. But the horse was a magical one. It carried the rider, if he was sincere, to his heart's desire.

Seeking his heart's desire, the young prince disappeared one day on the horse. He was absent a long time. After many adventures he returned with a beautiful princess from the Country of Light, and his father was overjoyed at his safe return and listened to the story of the magic horse.

The horse was made available to anyone who wanted it in that country. But many people preferred the obvious benefits which the actions of the first prince provided for them because to them the horse always looked like a plaything. They did not get beyond the outer appearance of the horse, which was not impressive - just like a plaything.

When the old king died, the 'prince who liked to play with toys' became, by his wish, the king. But people in general despised him. They much preferred the excitement and interest of the discoveries and activities of the practical prince.

Unless we listen to the 'lazy' prince, whether he has a princess from the Country of Light with him or not, we shall not get beyond the outer appearance of the horse.. Even if we like the horse, it is not its outward shape which can help us travel to our destination.

Once upon a time Khidr, the teacher of Moses, called upon mankind with a warning. At a certain date, he said, all the water in the world which had not been specially hoarded, would disappear. It would then be renewed, with different water, which would drive men mad.

Only one man listened to the meaning of this advice. He collected water and went to a secure place where he stored it, and waited for the water to change its character.

On the appointed date the streams stopped running, the wells went dry, and the man who had listened, seeing this happening, went to his retreat and drank his preserved water.

When he saw, from his security, the waterfalls again beginning to flow, this man descended among the other sons of men. He found that they were thinking and talking in an entirely different way from before; yet they had no memory of what had happened, nor of having been warned. When he tried to talk to them, he realized that they thought that he was mad, and they showed hostility or compassion, not understanding.

At first, he drank none of the new water, but went back to his concealment, to draw on his supplies, every day. Finally, however, he took the decision to drink the new water because he could not bear the loneliness of living, behaving and thinking in a different way from everyone else. He drank the new water, and became like the rest. Then he forgot all about his own store of special water, and his fellows began to look upon him as a madman who had miraculously been restored to sanity.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

It's getting to something

when you actually have to appear on the ten o'clock news before your Doctors give you life-saving medicine...






We have forgotten ALL our shapes. Everything EVERYTHING is a rectangle. Except a rectangle. That's a "circumbular". Right.

And ta-da! our new number scheme onetwothreefourfivesixseveneightnineten... onety-one, onety-two, onety-three, onety-four.... it makes sooooooo much more sense that I am tempted to go with it...

Went to

the museum today. That killed five minutes. Started up some interesting discussions. Kinda.

Then we walked past the cathedral to get to Tescos (which he was most animate about... Tescos, that is, not the Cathedral) and made the intention to take him there one day - tomorrow perhaps, to show him the enormity of the building and how Christians pray etc.


Anyway, Merry I've been emailing you. Have you not been in receipt of the mails or do you hate me. I'm happy with either reply. *shrugs*

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Sufi books for children

I don't know if it is co-incidence but my son is finding the Idries Shah books that I bought him for the past two Eids unput-downable. He requests them over and over again, much more than other books. So here they are for you to peruse:

The Boy Without A Name


The Magic Horse

The Old Woman
and the Eagle

The Clever Boy and the Terrible, Dangerous Animal




The Man with
Bad Manners

"The boy without a name" is very short but the illustrations are beautiful. "The Lion who saw himself in the water" is a longer story and has grabbed his attention much more even if the illstrations do not match the first.

Go take a look.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

A is for....

Boss: apple

Me: Yes, well done

Boss: ... and ant.

Me: Yes. Yes it is.

Boss: B is for box

Me: Yup.

Boss: and boy

Me: Clever boy, yes it is

Boss: and ball.

Me: *smiles*

Boss: and BMW and brakes

Me: Can't argue there. Yeah it is.

Boss: H is for house. And Honda. And Hyundai.

Me: Ok

Boss: T is for tractor. And truck. And Toyota.

Me: Right on all accounts

Boss: G is for.... ... for ... for....

Me: *Racks brain*

Boss: G is for... ... for ... for... *errie silence*

Me: *finishes racking brain*

Boss: *Lightbulb goes on and instead of shouting 'eureka' explodes with:* GOB!

Me: Well, yeah... I suppose it is...

Boss: *breaking into a monologue of the virtues of various vehicles* L is for limousine. I like limousines. Can we have a limousine. Or an ice-cream van? Ice-cream begins with 'i'. Purple ice-cream vans and white limousine.... *trails off into the distant whilst I phase out all noise in my head and heartily give thanks to Allah that He saw fit to put me in an age of motor-vehicles as I have no idea how I would cope with kids if there were just horses and carriages...*

Child Trust Fund

Shariah Baby Bond®
UK's only Shariah Compliant Child Trust Fund account

Jzk to Sanika for that link


is the only word I can utter. Others include, "Urgh" "Hmph" "Ur" and "Nng" and anything else that requires no use of facial muscles. I am soooooooooooooooooo tired.

Sooooooo tired. Zonked from cleaning the house for Eid. Zonked from the frenzy of Eid. Zonked from having Jaws wake every hour on the hour the whole of last night.

This must be nipped in the bud. This must be stopped. He must know that the umbilical cord was severed 4 months ago and under no circumstances whatsoever is it to be reattached. The floor is a good surface. It is good to lie there a while. You don't need to be constantly jiggled to be happy. You don't need to be in your mother's arms/lap to feel contentment. I will NOT strap you to my back. I will not do it. It. Will. Never. Happen. Not only because I suffer from Labyrinthitis and the possibility of falling and smashing your skull in or smothering you is a very real possibility, but also because I NEED BOTH MY ARMS AND I LIKE GOING TO THE TOILET IN PRIVATE.

Yes, I know some people in the under-developed world strap children to their backs and get on with life. Last time I looked they were the people breaking their necks to get into this place so they can shove their kids in childcare and have a life. My husband is African. So is my MIL - they say the only women there who ever strapped children to their backs are the women who never let the babies learn the hard way that Mum is a human being free to come and choose as she wishes and LET THEM GET OVER IT THEIR OWN WAY.

So I envisage some crying in the next few days. But it needs to be done. I can no longer go through the day waiting for my DH to come home so I can rugby-pass the baby into his arms. Bubba must learn to appreciate the ascetics of furniture and CAN IT.

Must go dress children. Hurty thing in face. Must take big pills full of white man medicine.


Friday, November 04, 2005

(Re-)reading THIS book

And totally enjoying it. A good read for people who think the Sufis were just tales of the ancients and who think such people died out a long time ago.

You know, if you meet Muslims who were born and raised in some Muslim communities and hear their stories and experiences you realise how far off the mark we really are. You know that Abba song that goes "I believe in angels..."... hm.... we take Islam at the intellectual level whilst some Muslims take it at the experiential. Aren't you tired of reading about the meal and want to taste if yourself??

I am.

EDIT: I mean "I am tired of just reading about it rather than getting a chance to taste it" NOT "I am tasting it"...


The Night before Eid

And all through the house... nothing was stirring.. not even a mouse...

Then the kids woke up and all hell broke loose

View, if you will, the carnage

Eid aftermath

And my pretty shoes :) LOL

We all had a great day. A hearty alhamdulillah :)

We conducted two experiments today

... which isn't bad for an average HE day - even better considering it is Eid.

The first experiment was to test how long one could sit at AWorld devoid of all heat before frostbite set in and/or one lost the will to live.

(Answer: two hours. Just)

The second experiment is set to observe how much chocolate, crips, sweets, saturated fat of various origin and sugar in general, one can imbibe before the kidney's collapse, one falls into a coma or one becomes so hyperactive that they have to be given Ritilin or prozac injected straight into the jugular. This experiment is still on-going but we believe it is seven tonnes.

May post some piccies later.

Thursday, November 03, 2005


Last day of Ramadan and that's always sad. The barakah is already ebbing away and the easy nearness to Allah already severing. From now until next Ramadan the Work will be harder. I hope everybody had an uplifting time, a time where one's relationship with Allah was strengthened and new resolves to increase ibadah were made. If anybody witnessed the power and beauty of Laylatul Qadr then, masha'allah! and please make du'a that one year (at least) I too will see the splendour. Amin. And to that end I intend to strive harder this year than in any other I have lived since I have learned a lot these past months and realised things at a deeper level.

Forgive me if I have offended you at any time, and I forgive you.

Eid tomorrow. One blitzed house. One dizzy lady. One excited kid. One kid just been given his first taste of mango. One dad stocking up on mango. Many splitting headaches some hoovering left to do. Hope you all have a great day :)

And you think *you* got problems...


Plus, it's also the name of a washing detergent - and who the hell would want to name their kid after that?


Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Beautiful article

Al-Hikam Al-'ata'iyya: The Book of Wisdom
By Nuh Ha Mim Keller

Just to confirm...

... insha'allah I will be at AWorld on Friday between 10:00/10:30 - 12-ish. I think Eid will be on Friday anyway but even if it isn't I will still be there i.a. So anybody else coming or will I be on my tod?

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